Susan, Disappointment is a huge part of life. You have your heart on jumping out the window of opportunity well before you're actually able to reach it, then, once you get to it it's slammed shut on you. I'm not much of a spiritual person these days but If it's god who does so then perhaps it's because you had the wrong window in mind the entire time. Hell, maybe you were supposed to use the door. lol. Anyway, God (Or something) throws things at us nonstop until we think that one more wrong turn will break us.....then shows us a map and helps us figure out where we're going. Even if only for a short time. You're destination may change a hundred times in your lifetime. Just know that getting there is not the important part. Those wrong turns, though....that's what makes life interesting. Don't worry so much about getting there. Try to get back into that "God will get me through it" mindset from high school.

I miss you and Rach. Hope you are both doing wonderfully! <33